Control & Power Over Others
Wanting influence or wishing outcomes would go your way is a part of normal life, but when your heart begins to dominate others — whether through manipulation, insistence on being right, or insistence on having things your way — relationships can become strained, anxious, and distant. You may find yourself stepping in to fix others, feeling frustrated when people don’t follow your plans, or equating leadership with control instead of service. These patterns can leave you weary and isolated even if they were meant to create order or success.
Spiritually, the desire for control often reflects a deeper struggle with trust — a belief that peace and safety come through managing every outcome rather than resting in God’s care. When you seek power over the people around you, it can pull your heart away from the gentle sovereignty of Christ, who invites us into a life of love, service, and mutual submission. But the gospel offers a different kind of strength — one rooted in humility, compassion, and trust in God’s authority. In Jesus, you discover that real freedom comes not from controlling others, but from letting His Spirit shape your heart and relationships.
Feed the flock of God which is among you, taking the oversight thereof, not by constraint, but willingly; not for filthy lucre, but of a ready mind;
Neither as being lords over God's heritage, but being ensamples to the flock.
— 1 PETER 5:2–3
The fear of man bringeth a snare: but whoso putteth his trust in the LORD shall be safe.
— PROVERBS 29:25
Resources for Helping with Control Issues
Why Are Control Freaks Prone to Idols?
A Desiring God interview with John Piper exploring why control-seeking behavior can become an idol and how to trust God’s…
Does God Control Everything?
A Timothy Keller sermon from Gospel in Life addressing whether God controls everything and what that means for faith and…
Explore Practices That Shape the Heart
Take Your Next Steps
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An Invitation to Join Us @ Sonrise
At Sonrise Church, we believe real life change happens when people encounter Jesus, walk in truth, and grow together in community. You are welcome here—no matter your past, your struggles, or where you’re starting from. Join us this Sunday to take your next step toward freedom and formation with us. Jesus changes everything.
Sonrise Church
Service Times:
- Sunday : 9:00 AM (1st Service)
- Sunday : 10:40 AM (2nd Service)
At Sonrise Church in Santee, CA, we understand how the desire to control outcomes and people can create internal pressure and relational stress — especially when life feels unpredictable or uncertain. In East County San Diego, many wrestle with managing expectations, directing others, or trying to create safety through control rather than surrender. Sonrise Church offers compassionate teaching and community rooted in Scripture that helps you explore what it means to trust God’s authority and walk in freedom that isn’t dependent on controlling others.
In Santee, El Cajon, La Mesa, and Lakeside, our church family gathers to encourage one another in letting go of anxious striving and embracing peace that comes from resting in God’s care. Jesus models a servant-hearted life and invites us into relationships marked by love, grace, and mutual respect rather than dominance or control. If you’re longing for healthier relationships and a heart shaped by trust and humility, Sonrise Church in East County San Diego is a place to take your next steps with others walking the same journey of faith.
Come discover how the gospel reshapes your heart toward trust, surrender, and freedom in Christ.